Last week I was visited by the Green Eyed Blog Monster. She’d been lurking in the shadows quite a while, but on Thursday without warning she appeared from nowhere to send me into a proper meltdown.
Here’s what the Blog Monster said:
You see, my Blog Monster likes to compare. And, as much as I don’t like to admit it, the Blog Monster is part of me.
I know that I’m not supposed to care about numbers and that I shouldn’t compare my own blogging journey to others but it’s really bloody hard sometimes, especially when you see the people who started at the same time as you on a stratospheric rise and your blog seems to just be plodding along.
Here are some simple, unavoidable truths about why I DO care and why it’s okay to aspire to more.
The more followers you have (and I’m talking genuine followers, not bought ones!) the more likely you are to:
I have no plans to quit my day job and I don’t make any money from blogging (in fact I spend a fair bit to keep it running!) so things like a loyal, growing following, shares and comments and brilliant experiences are the things that make me feel rewarded and supported and like I should carry on. And I think it’s okay to admit to that.
I also know that some people will read this and think: I really don’t know what she’s going on about, she’s really lucky! I’ve seen all of the wonderful freebies and events she’s been to that I would have given my right arm to get invited to. Stop comparing!
But that’s the thing about the Blog Monster, it’s never satisfied despite what we achieve (and yes, I’m INCREDIBLY grateful for everything so far by the way!!!). There’s always someone or something else to compare yourself to.
I don’t even know where I’m going with this post, other than that I wanted to share it because the Blog Awards season has started and whilst it can be fun and exciting and make people feel amazing, not everyone can win and it can also lead to disappointment and comparisons and people feeling like they don’t matter in the grand scheme of things. So I suppose what I’m trying to say is, It’s okay, I feel it too!
So what to do about it? How do I cope when I get an attack of the Blog Monster?
Not on social media, HELL NO! But sometimes just voicing my hopes and fears and frustrations out loud to an understanding friend helps me to sort through what is genuinely getting me down and what is simply a silly little niggle. (I have one particular friend who is really good at telling me when I’m being a self absorbed, nonsensical prat).
The easiest way to stop comparing is to have nothing to compare to. If you’re feeling an attack of the Blog Monster loom, don’t pore over social media making yourself feel even worse, go and watch Netflix for a bit, make yourself a cuppa, take a bath… whatever helps you to clear your head.
Once I’ve indulged in a pity party, I dust myself off and tell the Blog Monster to go shove it! Then I go out and MAKE things happen. I’d go so far as to say that when I feel frustrated or knocked back, it just makes me more determined to do more and do better.
It’s easier said than done I know, but to get anywhere with a blog these days takes persistence, determination and effort. Quitters never win and winners never quit!
Remember that the people who have ‘made it’, the ones with those million instagram likes a second or the ones who’ve just gone on a press trip more than likely earned it through their own hard work and determination! By all means, it’s okay to feel jealous, but don’t let it lead to resentment or begrudge others their opportunities.
Celebrate and support other’s successes, just as you’d want them to celebrate yours.
Do you have a Blog Monster? How do you deal with it?
